My name is Brad. I am a writer, I am awkward in social situations, and I spend a lot of time in coffee shops trying to escape all of the terribly distracting things I find at home (video games, movies, tv, cats, comics, vitamin water, robots, etc.). I rotate amongst local coffee shops throughout the week so that no single location becomes too familiar with my presence. Spending any appreciable amount of time in one place is bound to make you privy to the occasional odd situation, but I have come to believe that coffee shops are breeding grounds for weird. The following is my account of the wonderfully weird and horribly awkward situations I have encountered.

An Exercise in Knowing The Limits of Your Potential.

This particular Starbucks is adjacent to a Porsche dealership that was displaying a few bright yellow cars.  CJ, about 6, told Mom that she should buy one.

Mom: CJ, I will probably never be able to afford that car in my entire life.

There was then a long silence where CJ was disappointed and Mom realized she’d somewhat evaluated the entire rest of her existence.

At that point a helpful Baristo decided to break the awkward silence.

Baristo: Tell him he should buy himself one when he grows up.

CJ smiles and looks back to Mom.

CJ: How do I make 100 million infinity dollars?
Mom: You have to be a doctor or a lawyer.
CJ: Okay.
Mom: But if you don’t want one of those cars, you could be a firefighter.

Also, I must note that “100 million infinity dollars” was the exact term that CJ used.

Leave a Comment

Hopefully something coffee related...

2 Comments so far

1. Brian February 15, 2009 11:54 pm

   So….. Is she saying it’s okay to be a firefighter, you just won’t be able to afford a porshe. She is right I might add.

2. Gingy January 20, 2011 9:30 am

   At least she didn’t say become a writer :p