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Creepiest. Shirt. Ever.

September 9, 2009.
Coffee Shop: Burbank Simply Coffee @ Lima & Magnolia

I’m not one to start talking to people that I don’t know. Though some of that policy stems from my crippling lack of social skills, I also generally don’t like bothering and/or hitting on people as they do standard activities that shouldn’t involve fending off strangers. Getting coffee is one of those activities.

Some people don’t feel that way. I watched as a Creeper walked up to a woman with a baby and proceeded to make odd noises at the baby, pet it, tickle it, and talk about how “mature” it looked. As the Baby Creeper tried to talk to the mom about his own 6 year-old daughter, the women got her coffee and left, posthaste.

That’s when Baby Creeper talked to a fairly unresponsive baristo named Greg.

Baby Creeper: “Greg, I need a shirt that says “I have a 6 year old. I am not a stalker.” The mom seemed kinda weirded out. He had such a funny face. So mature. I just had to get a peek at him.”

Don’t get that shirt.

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  1. sad October 20, 2009 9:19 pm

    peek

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