My name is Brad. I am a writer, I am awkward in social situations, and I spend a lot of time in coffee shops trying to escape all of the terribly distracting things I find at home (video games, movies, tv, cats, comics, vitamin water, robots, etc.). I rotate amongst local coffee shops throughout the week so that no single location becomes too familiar with my presence. Spending any appreciable amount of time in one place is bound to make you privy to the occasional odd situation, but I have come to believe that coffee shops are breeding grounds for weird. The following is my account of the wonderfully weird and horribly awkward situations I have encountered.

We Also Use The Metric System, Bro!

I’ve got a new local Coffee Bean. It’s roomy and within walking distance. Also, at night it fills up with a bunch of Douchey Persian Guys that crowd your personal space, glare at you, yell a lot as they play cards, and smoke like chimneys.

One of them was on his cellphone calling for another card player…

D.P.G.: “Yeah, come over. We’re European, dawg, we’re gonna be here for an hour!”

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