My name is Brad. I am a writer, I am awkward in social situations, and I spend a lot of time in coffee shops trying to escape all of the terribly distracting things I find at home (video games, movies, tv, cats, comics, vitamin water, robots, etc.). I rotate amongst local coffee shops throughout the week so that no single location becomes too familiar with my presence. Spending any appreciable amount of time in one place is bound to make you privy to the occasional odd situation, but I have come to believe that coffee shops are breeding grounds for weird. The following is my account of the wonderfully weird and horribly awkward situations I have encountered.

Awkwardness Wears A Hat.

Even when I’m doing work at a coffee shop with a friend, sometimes I like to get my own table.  Keeps me focused.  This particular time, while there with my buddy AJ, there were plenty of tables open… which is what made it so funny when a random Guy in a Hat decided to sit [...]

What Came First, The Guinea Pig or The Cage?

A Teacher sat with Another Teacher discussing her class pet, which was a guinea pig…
Teacher: “Guinea pigs are from South America.”
Another Teacher: “Oh that’s weird. They’re actually from somewhere? I just thought they were some sort of domesticated something.”

The conversation abruptly changed topics after that.

Two Trash Cans Diverged in the Woods…

A man had some papers he needed to throw away. There were a multitude of options:
A) Trash can by door.
B) Trash can by counter.
C) Trash can near the place with all the creamer and sugar and cinnamon and stuff.
D) Trash can in the men’s room.
Which option did he choose?
He went a write-in of…
E) Trash [...]

Trampy Mother Knows Best.

There were two girls discussing their various piercings and how their families reacted.  As I was walking past, I caught this key bit of conversation:
Miss Robinson: My mom didn’t want me to get a bellybutton piercing.  She said she’d love for me to have one if I had the stomach for it, but I don’t.
Though [...]